Jackie Collins blamed self for not checking lump

Why best-selling book writer Jackie Collins kept her breast cancer a secret for years

Best-selling steamy-book author Jackie Collins may have given away one of her best stories.

Or, at least, one of her longest held secrets.

Only days before she died last month, Collins was interviewed by Elizabeth Leonard of People magazine for a series of articles in which she revealed, for the first time publicly, her longstanding breast cancer diagnosis and impending death.

She said, from her Beverly Hills home, that she wanted on her gravestone the following: "She gave a great deal of people a great deal of pleasure."

That pleasure took the form of what severe critics called filthy or sexy trash, and more charitable detractors called cliché-riddled potboilers (defined in her case as melodramatic novels about Hollywood, celebrities and their glamorous lives that may have been written expressly to make money rather than for artistic purposes).

Collins' father, Joe, despite expressing pride in her accomplishments, told her he believed her books were pornographic.

Jackie (left) and Joan Collins

People noted that the 77-year-old writer had kept her secret from her older sister, Joan Collins, 82, star of television's "Dynasty," for six and a half years because she didn't want to be a burden. 

Jackie said that she'd protected her sister because "she's very positive and very social but I'm not sure how strong she is."

When Jackie died, Joan told People she was "completely devastated" by having lost her "best friend."

Jackie had informed her three adult daughters — Tracy, Tiffany and Rory — but only after Rory, too, was diagnosed with breast cancer.  

She told only them, however, because "I didn't want to be on the front of the 'Enquirer' with two weeks to live. And I didn't want people's sympathy. I think sympathy can weaken you. I don't live my life that way. I like to be in control and so I took control of the situation."

She also told People she'd had to deal with losing her mother to breast cancer, her husband to prostate cancer and a fiancé  to lung cancer, "and I did not want to put pressure on everybody in the family. So I happily, happily went day by day."

She had only one regret about the way she handled the situation, noting that she'd written five books since her initial diagnosis.

Over a period of four decades, she'd sold more than five million copies of her "naughty narratives" — 32 best-sellers in all — throughout the world.

At her death, she reportedly was still writing — and working on her autobiography.

The one regret? She admitted she'd delayed seeing a doctor for two years after being aware of a lump in her breast. 

Why the wait? Because she was "completely doctor-phobic" and believed, erroneously, that the tumor was benign. 

In truth, it had metastasized to her bones.

Her disclosure at the end, she said, was intended to prod women into getting regular checkups and to save lives. "Always get it checked," she told People, "And the sooner the better. That is the best advice I can give."

"I know we're all told to do it," she added, "but some of us are too stupid, and I was one of them."

In my book, "Rollercoaster: How a man can survive his partner's breastcancer," I, Woody Weingarten, detail how others deal with the diagnosis — some want everyone to know what's going on, some want no one to know.

Good Morning America host reveals struggle

TV anchor's marriage survives breast cancer, mastectomy, 'hurtful' People mag headline

Amy Robach, Andrew Shue at Breast
Cancer Research Foundation gala.

Statistically speaking, nine out of every 10 relationships will survive breast cancer, its treatments and its aftermath.

That may not sound so good, with 10 percent failing, but consider that conventional wisdom predicts as high as 50 percent of all marriages in the United States will fail sooner or later.

The positive 90 percent includes me, Woody Weingarten, and my wife, Nancy Fox; everyman John Doe and his everywoman wife, Jane; and 42-year-old Good Morning America host Amy Robach and her 48-year-old husband, actor-entrepreneur Andrew Shue.

Robach, who was diagnosed with the disease in 2013, admitted to People writer Emily Strohm in a series of stories last month and this one that the disease had threatened their marriage.

"All of a sudden I felt like I needed him in a very needy way, and that's not my personality," she said. "It threw everything up in the air. It was rough."

She said she had "completely crumbled" during the crisis.

He, in turn, explained that he struggled to find the right balance when it came to her emotions. "You find yourself walking on eggshells a little bit. Like, did I say the right thing? Did I do the right thing?"

After her diagnosis, which she'd disclosed — with Shue by her side — on television to Robin Roberts, another GMA anchor who successfully battled breast cancer, Robach underwent a double mastectomy and chemotherapy.

She was glad she'd chosen that particular surgery because physicians found a second malignancy that hadn't previously been detected.

But Robach and Shue both had to overcome their anxieties to reach the point where, she explained, she could learn "how strong we can be together. We're a solid team now." 

To get there, they had to "be honest about the fears" and change the way they were communicating. That included not withholding anything from each other.

Robach has also taken out the time to blast People for its negative headline, "Cancer Nearly Destroyed My Marriage," which she told "The View" had been "very hurtful." 

After her criticism, People softened its online headline.

Robach, who earlier had proclaimed that "I'm the poster child for someone who thought cancer couldn't happen to them," had been diagnosed after an on-air mammogram that had been intended "to help encourage women to get checked."

The news anchor has a new book, "Better," which tracks her battle with breast cancer and its aftermath.

Meanwhile, my book, "Rollercoaster: How a man can survive his partner's breast cancer," which is aimed at male caregivers, directly addresses how relationships can grow closer despite the ups and downs of the morass caused by the disease.

Check it out.

Caregiving for cancer patients: parallel feelings?

Tom Hanks, 'Rollercoaster' author share need to give care to breast cancer patient wives

Hollywood superstar Tom Hanks has become an instant male caregiver.

Why?

Because his 58-year-old actress wife, Rita Wilson, recently choose to undergo a double mastectomy.

And reconstructive breast surgery.

She'd been diagnosed with breast cancer after a first test, a biopsy, had mistakenly come back negative.

Rita Wilson and Tom Hanks

The disease and operations — according to the Daily Dish site of the San Francisco Chronicle — caused her to temporarily absent herself from "Fish in the Dark," a Broadway play she'd been appearing in.

She was quoted as telling People magazine she's "getting better every day" and expects "to make a full recovery."

Hanks now must deal with feelings similar to those I experienced when my wife underwent "slash, poison and burn" treatments for breast cancer 20 years ago — feelings detailed in my new VitalityPress book, "Rollercoaster: How a man can survive his partner's breast cancer."

My book — aimed at husbands, boyfriends, fathers, sons and brothers of breast cancer patients — is a memoir-chronicle, a love story, and an up-to-the-minute guide to research, meds and where to get help.

It illustrates that, despite surgery, chemotherapy and radiation, there can be light at the end of the tunnel. 

According to the American Cancer Society, 13 percent of American women (one in every eight) will get breast cancer at some point, with three-quarters of them having no risk factors except that they’re female.

Wilson — who married Hanks in 1988 and subsequently appeared with him in "Sleepless in Seattle," "That Thing You Do!" and Larry Crowne" — took action after getting a second medical opinion, something she recommends to others as being "critical to your health."

Trust your instincts, she advised, adding that "early diagnosis is key."